Berna's third blog

Chatting with her while she was watching Donnie Darko for the first time. Basically “what,...

Mon, 20 May 2013 20:28:44 +0200

Chatting with her while she was watching Donnie Darko for the first time. Basically “what, shit, wtf, noooooooo, wait, wait wait, ohhhhhh, damn! shit fuck whoa! noooooo ohhhh my, haha oh that song…wait a minute…. oooooh nonoooooooooo and then the girl… what?! noooo”.

And then at the end “I love this movie!”.

I don’t want to think. I have many things to do today, but I don’t feel like doing any...

Mon, 20 May 2013 10:46:50 +0200

I don’t want to think. I have many things to do today, but I don’t feel like doing any of them. Today is a local festivity of Barcelona, so I didn’t go to work. Instead, I stayed, sleeping not so long as I had wished.

Yesterday I had a severe headache. I haven’t slept well in the whole weekend. I had to help my father on Saturday, then I went with some friends to the lake. The night before I stayed up until one in the morning, talking with the girl. On Sunday I went to the church, and I couldn’t sleep either at the evening because I had a meeting. And at night I took a train back to my house.

But I forgot to shut the phone down, and early this morning I started receiving emails from the other divisions of the company, and personal emails, and notifications of chats and lots of things more. And damn technology, it should be forbidden to bother before eight. And now I still have a headache, and I have some nice things to explain of this weekend but I’ll do it later.

I’m going to do something very unproductive and selfish and spend the day resting.

Golden Leaves | Passenger

Sun, 19 May 2013 16:37:35 +0200

Golden Leaves | Passenger

I saw today a girl on the subway that was reading something on a netbook. I was sitting in front of...

Mon, 13 May 2013 21:02:55 +0200

I saw today a girl on the subway that was reading something on a netbook. I was sitting in front of her, and I could see she was reading because of the reflection in the glass.
She was enjoying it and she wanted to laugh, but she was fighting the smile. Bit by bit, her lips curled up and she finally was smiling broadly. And it was a nice smile, and I thought that that is precisely why people write, or at least why I want to write. That smile made my day.

Wolf, National Geographic

Mon, 13 May 2013 20:53:00 +0200

Wolf, National Geographic

Saturday was a very productive day, indeed. This morning I went to the church, and finally I met...

Mon, 13 May 2013 00:55:49 +0200

Saturday was a very productive day, indeed. This morning I went to the church, and finally I met this man who gave the lectures some weeks ago and he handed me some CDs about evolution vs. creationism, you know, and it’s just a shame that my computer doesn’t have a CD player, because I’ll have to wait until next week that I’ll be in town to get access to the videos. Who uses CDs anymore, anyway?

And, as usual, I had a headache that made my life slightly difficult, and I stayed home in the afternoon. I don’t want to make an habit of this, but I don’t have the strength to tolerate that man on the church preaching things I don’t think the Bible is in accordance with. So, instead I stayed home and wrote some things that I think ended up being something useful and talked with the girl from the chat. Since some days ago, we’ve been talking by phone too, and yesterday we made a videoconference. It’s nice to talk to her because we have some things in common and she empathizes with me and I think that’s good, because I also empathize with her. And we like to spend time talking; I do, and she says so, at least. So that’s good. I don’t feel that much lonely since I talk with her.

And I have found a little trouble writing lately. Mostly because of my moral convictions. You know, I have my time changing my point of view of morality to fit in God’s will, but as writing is something free, you know, I just let it go, I don’t force it, then there’s the dilemma, because I wrote some sex scenes, or some scenes that would be politically incorrect, and I think they fit very well in the story, but it’s not my point of view. I don’t know if you get me. I don’t want to be publishing things that could cause, in some way, difficulties to other persons maintaining a sane mind, to whichever notion of a “sane” mind they have. But at the same time, I don’t want to stop writing certain things just because of that, you know, I want to let it flow naturally.

So I won’t be publishing the sex scenes, I simply omitted them because they were not necessary in this case. And about the other issues I’ll be deciding as it comes. I don’t know if this has happened to other people who write, ~~probably~~ of course yes, but it kind of sucks.

Today is a good day. I slept well and now I’m going to study some cool psychology stuff. Have...

Sat, 11 May 2013 13:17:31 +0200

Today is a good day. I slept well and now I’m going to study some cool psychology stuff. Have a nice day you all!

ENDER’S GAME — Trailer (by...

Wed, 08 May 2013 18:14:16 +0200

ENDER’S GAME — Trailer (by SummitScreeningRoom)

Ender’s Game movie trailer, guys!

May 1, 2013 (by berna.borrero)

Tue, 07 May 2013 20:30:56 +0200

May 1, 2013 (by berna.borrero)

Any Which Way | Scissor Sisters I listened to this song on the...

Tue, 07 May 2013 00:32:11 +0200

Any Which Way | Scissor Sisters

I listened to this song on the radio this morning and now I saw the video and I just had to share it with you.
Come on, Monday, Tuesday, whatever!

(by Caroline Adler)

Sat, 04 May 2013 22:22:21 +0200

(by Caroline Adler)

(by Brooke Pennington)

Fri, 03 May 2013 13:03:00 +0200

(by Brooke Pennington)

I changed my avatar, and my blog theme, and my description. I needed a change. I need more color in...

Fri, 03 May 2013 02:21:32 +0200

I changed my avatar, and my blog theme, and my description. I needed a change. I need more color in my life. If this blog is a reflection of my life, I’m pretty dull. It has been surprising to see myself from the outside, I look like an antisocial freak. I don’t feel like that at all, maybe because I’m always dreaming. Maybe I dreamt so much that I forgot to live my life plentifully.

I will try, from now on, to live more on the outside, to change the things I don’t like in my real life and to live more “in the light”, rather than in the dark. Thanks. Good night.

The Civil Wars | New Self-Titled Album Coming Soon Look, people!...

Thu, 02 May 2013 13:18:00 +0200

The Civil Wars | New Self-Titled Album Coming Soon

Look, people! The Civil Wars are going to release a new album soon! The sooner the better, guys!

Much better. Tons of sleep and a nice conversation fixed me. Ha, when I read, time ago, that drug...

Thu, 02 May 2013 13:01:34 +0200

Much better. Tons of sleep and a nice conversation fixed me. Ha, when I read, time ago, that drug withdrawal could provoke adverse emotional symptoms I thought “not me”. Ha ha ha. Ha.

I only lack some coffee and everything will be fine again.

No, I can with this. Everyone makes mistakes. Being exposed is a natural part of life, it’s...

Thu, 02 May 2013 01:04:25 +0200

No, I can with this. Everyone makes mistakes. Being exposed is a natural part of life, it’s important to establish sane relationships. I don’t have to be afraid of being hurt. I have people that love me, I just don’t have a partner yet. I can with this, I’m not going back.

I have to fight, I can’t get back to phase three. Depression was over, wasn’t it? I...

Thu, 02 May 2013 00:49:52 +0200

I have to fight, I can’t get back to phase three. Depression was over, wasn’t it? I can’t let myself sink there again. No no no, please. No, please.

I knew I was going to get hurt playing like that with my weak feelings. I was never strong, I just wanted love. I’m sorry, I’m sorry.

Why? Broken dreams chase me. The bravery of my fears attack me at night. No, I’m not afraid of anything. Anything, I say, except of that. I’m afraid of being alone all my life. I’m afraid of being unable of finding my right mate. I’m afraid that I’m such a bad person that I don’t deserve love, that anyone wants to love me, that anyone will let me love them. I’m afraid that I will be this frozen all my life. What’s wrong with me? I just mess things up, always. Or maybe I misinterpret people, I never understood them anyway. What’s the point of my life if I don’t have love?

I overreacted then, and I am probably overreacting now, but I feel a heavy weight pressing against my chest. I feel alone. Sorry for the weeping, I can’t help myself. Sorry.

Sorry, I know I am being ridiculous. Sorry.

Everything is good, I just have to focus on it.

Wed, 01 May 2013 19:30:21 +0200

Everything is good, I just have to focus on it.

(by buenaventura marco)

Wed, 01 May 2013 17:25:40 +0200

(by buenaventura marco)

So yesterday I finished reading Eclipse. Yes, I’m reading the Twilight series, they...

Wed, 01 May 2013 13:10:34 +0200

So yesterday I finished reading Eclipse. Yes, I’m reading the Twilight series, they aren’t that bad. I’m taking some ideas from there, mostly about the internal dialogs Bella has with herself. It’s something basic, everyone does it, or at least I do. Overthink constantly, repetitive thoughts… It’s a little difficult to write internal dialogs because it can bore the hell out of the reader, but it’s crucial to understand his/her personality, why s/he does what s/he does. I find it stimulating to put myself in the mind of the character and imagine what his thoughts might be.

I have to admit that some of the overthinking is part of my personality, and maybe –just maybe– I have shaped some of it in the form of a fictional character. Whatever, I’m having fun.